Friday Fundamentalist Farce File #3

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(NOTE: Because I spent all day Friday at the Iowa State Conference on Race and Ethnicity, including guest keynote Michele Norris from NPR’s All Things Considered, I did not have the opportunity to complete this week’s Farce File.  What is posted here is what I had completed prior to Friday, and I wanted to get something up!  Consider it a little preview into how I write, since this is not a finished product.)

It’s time again for your weekly digest of propaganda “news” from the religious right, courtesy of


blog-bullet 2/28/09 – Bible memorization credited with keeping kids faithful

Yep.  It’s true.  The more you brainwash them and socially isolate them from the rest of the knowledge and intellectualism the world has to offer, the more brainwashed they’ll be.  And how do they do it?  By brainwashing the parents, of course, too!

I could tell you many stories of moms and dads coming to Christ because it all started when they were helping little Jimmy or little Sally with their handbook.

Religion only survives because people are convinced to believe.  Our society sends the message that we should believe, and the proper exposure and influence convinces people to follow suit.  That doesn’t mean they understand what they believe, but anyone can convince hirself of anything.

This sounds all well and innocent, but just replace “faith” and “coming into the church” with “delusion” and “coming into the cult.”  It’s basic propaganda; it only sounds respectable because of Christian privilege.

blog-bullet 3/01/09 – Obama in Coulter crosshairs at CPAC

Seriously, is there no one on the right who understands (or cares about) Godwin’s Law?  You make a reference to Nazism and your argument’s over, because you were so petty and unintellectual and whiny that you couldn’t think of anything better than pure evil.  Well, that describes Ann Coulter pretty well, I’d say:

“Obama had the mainstream media, the entire European Union and Oprah on his side.  In fact, in a poll taken in Germany during the election, it showed that 80% of the German people supported Obama over McCain.  And we all know how infallible the Germans are at picking great leaders,” she joked.

Joked?  And people laugh at that?  Seriously, conservatives, grow up.  If I didn’t already know how ridiculously capable you are of convincing yourself of believing any ridiculous notion, I’d wonder how you have any dignity.

blog-bullet 3/02/09 – Home schoolers swarm to defend education

I love how the same people who so strongly supported a bad policy that depended on standards (NCLB) could now be so resistant to having to meet those standards themselves:

If passed, the bill would require home schoolers to double the amount of reporting currently required and would allow a school superintendant (sic) or principal to determine if the home school program should continue or be terminated.

How horrid!  Reporting?  Accountability?  Schools should never have to be held responsible in such ways for student learning.  We don’t need to know if they don’t know how to spell superintendent!

Donnelly says he and about 100 home schoolers were able to give testimony. “Well if it passed, this would become one of the most restrictive [home school] laws in the country,” he adds.

I’m missing the part where this is a bad thing.  What message do these home schoolers send when they say, “Hey, we think your education is crap, but we don’t want to have be held accountable for what we’re doing instead.”  What do they have to hide?  Completely biased or substandard educational experiences, perhaps?  If not, just prove it.

blog-bullet 3/03/09 – Young conservatives misled on homosexual issue

There’s only one truth when it comes to homosexuality: our totally warped and biased version of it!  Our good friend Peter is back to drive us absolutely crazy with his nonsense.  Here’s what he’s concerned about:

“Some people thought civil unions were just something you have to give the gay activists,” he points out. “Others thought it was a real compromise and didn’t realize how close it was to same-sex marriage and how it actually advances the same-sex marriage agenda.”

Are you ready?  Because here’s the kicker:

LaBarbera believes many young conservatives are being taught to think of homosexuality as a civil rights issue.

Uh oh!  Young conservatives are learning things and understanding things!  We must bring it to an end!

I won’t say any more for this story.  I thought it was good for a laugh.

blog-bullet 3/04/09 – Homosexual activists file suit, challenge DOMA

I wanted to post these articles just because I get a kick out of how they insist on calling us homosexual.  (See my terminology page for why that is not respectful language and an intentional decision on AFA’s part.)

(More would have been written here, but I’m sure I’ll have plenty to write about the DOMA challenge in the future.  Have a great weekend!)

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There are 4 Comments to "Friday Fundamentalist Farce File #3"

  • deldobuss says:

    About your “Homeschoolers Swarm To Defend Education”; the difference between reporting and accountability in homeschooling and public schools is this:
    We pay for public schools with our tax dollars, it is supposed to educate our children, and it doesn’t.
    With homeschooling, there are already standards and reporting that must be maintained in each state (and there is overwhelming evidence that homeschooling works), and the children are at home, with their parents, not in an institution.
    It’s like the difference between accountability in state-run health facilities and medicating yourself at home.

  • ZackFord says:

    Well, I will say that I understand your point of view, I just have trouble respecting it.

    If you think public schools aren’t doing a fair job educating, why aren’t you doing more to advocate for the resources the schools need and aren’t getting?

    I don’t appreciate the implication that parents are always “good” and institutions are always “bad.” Homeschooling might provide sufficient academic growth, but I think it greatly limits young people’s potential to encounter diversity, appreciate different viewpoints, and develop the skills necessary for peer interdependence and autonomy.

    I think your simile comparing homsechooling to self-medicating helps me make my point. If you screw up self-medicating, then maybe you die, and society moves on without you. It’s natural selection doing its thing. But if you homeschool and screw up, then that child goes out into society and has an impact on all of us. Exercise all the independence you want from your community, but you’re still a part of it and you still affect it, and if you aren’t going to trust it, then there’s no reason it should trust you. There needs to be accountability.

  • deldobuss says:

    I appreciate the dialogue.

    We must start with the fact that homeschooling is legal in all 50 states. I also start with the premise that you are not trying to make it illegal. (let me know if I am wrong)

    Homeschooling, though to many may be a means of isolation from society, does not have to be. Where else can you find diversity so diverse (pun intended) as going about your everyday life? I do not intend to shelter my children from the community, but to emphasize responsible citizenship.

    I agree that not all parents are good. But, you know that not all school teachers are good, and not all bosses are good. I also agree that a certain degree of accountability is good. I just don’t agree with the extremes that are laid out in the proposal in the article you cited. If these were imposed on all parents in regards to raising their kids, not just homeschoolers, there would be a royal outcry.

    The basic question would be, who is responsible for the child? Is it the parents, or the government? That is a question that has been asked many times, by many people. However, the supreme court has upheld parental right numerous times. Not really right, but responsibility. If I am ultimately responsible for my child, I am going to make sure they get the best possible education.

    I don’t want to put any more tax dollars and resources into public schooling, because the basic premise of school for the masses is what has me irked. “School” is meant to produce mindless drones who believe and do whatever society tells them to. Learning can never be some rote set of facts and behaviors. It can never be measured and standardized. It is played out in our lives, through our deeds, and with our words.

    Society is only as excellent as its throng.

    John Taylor Gatto is a wild read if you ever have the time.


    -Aadel in Kansas

  • ZackFord says:

    I appreciate the dialogue as well, though I must say that I respectfully disagree with your portrayal of “school.” While I do agree there are bad teachers, I think your ideas about “mindless drones” is unfortunate.

    An an educator myself, I know there are many passionate people committed to children’s learning. I also uphold that school is about encountering new and challenging ideas, and there are many concepts of socialization that are learned outside of the stated curriculum. Ideas such as leadership, critical thinking, interdependence, and autonomy only have the opportunity to develop when a young person has an opportunity to step out on hir own and not be sheltered to one way of thinking or one small group of people.

    I definitely respect your rights as a parent, but ultimately, by abandoning hope in the school system, you are also abandoning all of the other children who are not privileged enough to be homeschooled. Schools suffer because of poor funding: teachers aren’t paid enough, textbooks aren’t new enough, facilities aren’t safe enough. It’s this atrocious lack of resources that maintains socioeconomic class (and often racial) divides throughout our society. You should consider yourself lucky you have the time and resources to homeschool your children, but do not let your parenting cloud your role as a citizen.

    Society is only as strong as its weakest links. If you’re only working to support the educational experience of your own children, then you’re only helping to maintain the problem.

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