Homosexual Learning Outcomes in Need of Being Mocked

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No, we’re not talking about a curriculum about how to be gay. Quite the opposite. We’re talking about a curriculum of hate.

I haven’t written about AFTAH much on this blog, because they are so ridiculously out there that I don’t think they need to be written about to be mocked. Americans for Truth about Homosexuality is a hate group intent on preserving only the most archaic standards of sexuality. Next month, they are offering an entire “academy” to young potential haters about just how to hate on teh gays. Kids as young as 14 are welcome.

Hemant Mehta has offered to cover the costs for any young folks who want to go (and of course report on it). AFTAH requires “references” to make sure attendees aren’t undercover progays, but I’m sure some infiltrators will manage to get in.

Last week, the “academy” unveiled it’s “curriculum,” and whooee! is it a good time. Let’s take a look at the courses propaganda-fests and the wise professors known bigots who will impart their knowledge about homosexuality. (Jeremy Hooper was remarking this weekend about how just the use of the word “homosexuals” can be a big red flag for a person’s perspective on LGBT issues—not that we’re at all surprised by these clowns.)

After an opening prayer, Peter LaBarbera kicks things off with “From gay pride to gay tyranny.” This will be about the way that, after our parades are over, we go strangle teabaggers with our rainbow flags and then fist their children.

“Professor” Rena Lindevaldsen (I use quotes because she “teaches” at the Liberty University School of Law) then moves things along with “History of modern ‘gay’ activism and the courts.” She’ll spend the first 55 minutes bemoaning the way “gay” no longer means “happy,” and the last five minutes sharing everything she knows about courts.

Matt Barber will chime in with “Masculine Christianity: a non-defensive approach to the Culture War over homosexuality.” Part of his talk will explain how the best way to overcome homosexuality is through knowledge of sports and car mechanics, and then he’ll explain how folks like him started the Culture War by attacking homosexuals at every opportunity.

You’ll only get a light lunch so that you have room to stomach “The ‘born gay’ hoax,” presented by Ryan Sorba of Young Conservatives of California. This presentation should be particularly revealing, as Sorba will be sharing never-before-seen schematics of the microchips inserted in the genitalia of all future-homosexuals.

Everybody’s favorite, Laurie Higgins of the Illinois Family Institute, is up next. In “Using reason and logic in answering pro-homosexuality arguments,” she will magically not once refer to reason nor logic. She will outline all of the pro-homosexual arguments, then shrug and say, “But they’re wrong.”

Just in case you thought this was a Christian-only situation, here comes Arthur Goldberg from JONAH (Jews Offering Healthy Alternatives to Homosexuality). If you aren’t familiar with JONAH, they discourage people from having gay sex by teaching them new exercise routines and diet restrictions. No, gay men are not allowed to have any fruit. His talk will be called, “Can gays change? Is gay parenting good for kids? Presenting the research on homosexuality.” Here’s a preview: “Yes, No, You don’t really need to read any of it.”

The day is far from over. Next, all of the presenters of the day will form a panel to discuss “Can the effort to ‘mainstream’ homosexuality in American culture be stopped?” While the panel answers questions, participants will be distributed proton packs and the sheet music to Auld Lang Syne for a future field trip to the subway system.

Grab a bite to eat for dinner then return Thursday night for a special presentation by Greg Quinlan of Parents and Friends of Ex-Gays and Gays (PFOX). In “An Ex-Gay Christian Discusses Love, Truth and Homosexuality,” Quinlan will describe how hated he was and how much he was lied to while he was homosexual. Now that he’s ex-still-gay, his life is completely delusional, but happy.

Day 2! Cliff Kincaid is ready to tell you about “The battle over blood: ‘gay’ health risks and public policy.” I’m not sure why he needs a whole hour to say, “Don’t let them even touch you; they all have AIDS,” but I’m sure he’ll find a way to repeat it in some interesting ways.

The “professor” is back! “The zero-sum game: homosexuality-based ‘rights’ vs. religious and First Amendment freedoms” is another brief lecture about how Christians are right and nothing else matters.

Corrupting children, politicizing schools: the homosexual youth agenda“: More fisting.

The gender confusion agenda: ‘transgender rights’”: “We don’t get it, so there’s nothing to get.”

Ugh, this is exhausting. Here are the rest of the lectures. You comment with your favorite ways to make fun of them:

“From abomination to ‘gay’: answering ‘queer theology’ — Old Testament”

“The legal strategy to stop homosexual ‘marriage’: triumphs and pitfalls”

“Returning the debate to behavior – getting off the ‘GLBT’ playing field”

“From destroying DOMA to homosexualizing the military: Obama’s radical homosexual/transsexual agenda for America”

“But Jesus never said anything about homosexuality’”: Answering ‘Queer Theology’ — New Testament”

“Destructive legacy: Alfred Kinsey and the (Homo)Sexual Revolution”

“The big, pink plan for a lavender culture”/”How to lobby effectively”

“Combating pro-homosexual media bias, confronting pro-gay ‘conservatives’” – I love that they give “conservatives” the mocking quotes!

“Agreeing with God: a truly biblical approach toward ‘out and proud’ homosexuality”

“Confronting the zeitgeist: new strategies to turn around younger Americans on ‘gay rights’”

“Don’t Ask, Don’t Bleed: stopping Obama’s campaign to homosexualize the U.S. military”

Have at them my readers! Mock away!

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