Masturbation is Great! That is all.

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Jeremy Hooper points out today that Pastor Brad “They’re teaching our kids to masturbate” Brandon is hitching up with the NOM tour. Brandon also likes comparing us gays to alcoholics, adulterers, and pedophiles, and Jeremy’s got the audio to confirm it.

I know I’m job searching and everything, but I just want to take a brief moment to say that masturbation is a great thing.

If homosexuals were teaching high school students how to masturbate, as Brandon claimed this past May, I think it’s a wonderful thing. I don’t know why they’d be doing it in the Capitol Rotunda, but that seems beside the point.

I am skeptical that there exists a high school student who hasn’t figured out how to masturbate, and if there is, then by golly, he deserves to learn! Maybe there are some girls who don’t know, and why should they be left out? I applaud the homosexuals for spreading sexual literacy and also a very healthy alternative to unsafe sex.

Don’t you love America? Just condemn any word that relates to anything sexual and the Christians will cheer!

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